Thursday, January 27, 2011

Because I'm An Unobservant Wimp


That guy who was walking around yesterday?

Just realized... I've seen him before. He doesn't walk this way. He doesn't live in this complex, or near it. He goes down a different street at the first intersection.

I freaked out about this for a good hour and then spent my time huddled here. My knives are in a case - maybe I should leave them somewhere easier to reach now, despite not knowing how to use them... at all. My train of thought has basically been: ohshitohshitohshit what if he's a proxy is he a proxy oh fuck I'm dead this isn't happening... and so on. I took some Valerian - best way of calming myself down that is legal and available in the house - and I'm just shaky now.

There are explanations. He could totally not be a proxy...

Yeah, after seeing my totally favourite eldritch abomination pop up on the street corner when I went to the bank, I'm not going to believe in that. So, while I'm still kind of rambly and willing to say this, I didn't see him when I dove in. At all. Sure, there were some scares involving night and my dog barking at blank space but nothing until the 12th. Then, I so happened to need to go to the bank. There's a Pizza Pizza in the same plaza - they had a sign up with a pizza sliced four ways, diagonally. Kept giving me shocks because it formed the operator symbol. My parents always wondered why I kept saying how much I hated the sign, but I didn't explain, and then they took it down. I walked past, relieved that they took it down, cashed in a cheque, walked back and...

You know how in pictures your eyes tend to skip over some details in the background? My mind was screaming and I was scared but I looked and I couldn't see anything until I suddenly could and oh fucking god  I wanted to die right there out of terror, just so I didn't have to see him anymore. Like a little kid, I just stood there beside the parking lot and shut my eyes and when I opened them he was gone and I ran back and didn't leave the house again. I pretended to be sick after that, and then started code posts because... I don't know. To cope, except it never worked, and I just felt like every time I looked out a window, he'd be there. Sometimes, I was right.

But nothing fucking happened and I thought he was more focused on other stuff or other people - I know that's a selfish thought, such a selfish thought, but I can't help it - but it's not working because I don't think he sends proxies out for non-people. Or maybe they home in on their own...

I don't even know. I think I'll go to bed before I try looking out onto the street to see if the guy is there again.


  1. Stay calm, Stormy.

    try to stay calm.

  2. Storm, knives are easy. You hold the not-sharp and, and do anything you can to make the sharp end go into the person you want to bleed.

    On a less joky note, If you end up running (and if you've seen him you really should start soon.) and end up in the Philadelphia area I'll be glad to help you out.

  3. If I do run... I'd like to point out that such will probably make it harder for me to get into America, not easier. Since I'll, you know, be totally freaking out and not have a car and probably look totally suspicious lugging daggers around.

    Thanks for following and commenting Echo... you're part of my username. I'm tired enough to find this funny.

    Brief update - it is morning, nothing happened, I'm keeping my pointy things out in plain sight so I can reach. Get to walk to school and back again for my last exam, /fun/.

  4. Haha. I was totally going to get all indignant about how you stole my name, but you made yours first. I'll concede the point, as you seem to be the Canadian version of me.

    Anyway, keep yourself outta trouble. If there's any way I can help just tell me. If you need any instruction in knife defense, I specialized in it back when I studied martial arts.